I confess. I get a bit jumpy at times. And have a hard time falling and staying asleeep. If I fall asleep and there is a siren, will I hear it in time to make it down to the Mammad? When we go to a store or shopping area, the first instinct is to look for the large signs indicating a protected space. It’s an interesting way to live, always looking over your shoulder, so to speak.

Daily we get updates on the threat level. Somewhere in the North there is a red line to be crossed. I don’t know what or where that line is: it never seems to be specified out loud, but it looms on the horizon, just out of sight.

How can I best describe what life is like for me now? It’s like watching an action movie that gets so intense that you sometimes have to take a break. Even though you know the end of the story (spoiler alert- it turns out really well for the good guys), you don’t know where YOUR part comes in. You know all the actors are there on set, but you can’t remember exactly how or where or when the action will take shape.

In another analogy: if/when an all out war breaks out here in the North, will it be like ripping a bandage off a wound quickly? Or will it be a slow, spreading ooze of an infection? Pretty disgusting, I know, but if only I had a crystal ball or a magical screen that could peer into the future. Will it start with a bang or a squeak? It’s something that is completely beyond my control, so I just have to go about my days as normally and positively as possible.

Just in. Breaking news as I am writing this: Earlier this morning a large cache of weapons was found in a neighboring Arab city directly across the highway from us. Currently helicopters are circling overhead and my friend just NOW sent me another news flash. There has been a stabbing incident at our large outdoor shopping mall. The terrorist was neutralized (exactly what does this mean? Killed or just downed?) but not before he was able to stab three people. Two are in critical condition and will be taken to nearby hospitals. One is lightly injured.

No. I am not afraid. It says 365 times in the Scriptures, “Fear not.” “Do not be afraid. I am with you.” “ I go before you. Do not fear.” There is also a very popular Hebrew song that goes, “The whole world is a very narrow bridge. The main thing is to have no fear at all but faith in G-d.”

So interesting. Such timing. Such excitement. Coincidence? We just got a call from our dear friend in Virginia. Seems it’s the lede story on the Times of Israel webpage now. She wanted to know if we knew or had heard or seen anything. The people stabbed at our local mall this morning were soldiers.

If we stay hidden inside our homes for fear of attack, they have won. If our lives are crippled, our lives and patterns changed, then they have won. If we are so paralyzed that we leave the country and move elsewhere, they have won. We cannot allow ourselves to be bullied. Remain vigilant. Keep calm. Carry on. Be happy. Do good. Live life fully with gratitude.

I was going through my photos last night. My phone gives me highlights and memories of where we were in years past on that date. Four years ago on 2 July, John and I were enjoying a lovely tiyuul (daytrip) with friends to see the art/grafitti at the northern border wall. The wall or barrier with Lebanon. At that time, we could go right up to the highly patrolled wall, and even into the little lookouts.

The most interesting part was the graffiti. Most of it was symbolic of Israel’s desire for peace and for both sides to be able to come together. Even the Bible verse from Isaiah looks forward to the time when nation will not life sword against nation.

I have no doubt that the border wall is now pretty much shot up now. That all the wonderful places we used to frequent- I just hope they are all intact and can return to normal visits soon enough – the Irish pub, in Fassuta (how random to find an actual authentic Irish pub that catered to the UK UNFIL forces!); the natural rock formation, Keshet Arch; the caves near the Lebanese border; Amram, Dalton and Naftali Wineries; Julius Distillery and the wonderful little cafe in Hanita; Birya Forest and picnics; our friends in Gush Halav/Jish with its first century synagogue and Maronite community. The Circassian villages. The Rosh ha Nikrah Caverns and the goat dairy, Galili, at Kibbutz Rosh Ha Nikra. The Canada Center Olympic Ice Rink in Metulla. The hiking in Banias! And all the architectural wonders like Abraham’s City Gate, the oldest found, Agrippas’ palace, Nimrod’s fortress, Crusader Castles. There’s so much beauty and history and wonder here.

I’m saddened by all those who have lost homes and livelihoods because they have been displaced for the past nine months. All the business that have been shuttered. All the tour guides and bus drivers, restaurants and tourist attractions that have been affected, thus directly impacting the average citizen.

More reports as I am writing: My friends’ daughter just went from her regular military service last week, straight into reserve duty without a break. She will not be going back ‘home’ to Texas for her summer vacation. She is needed here on the medical front. They are expecting a full military situation imminently. Yikes. We are prepared as much as can be. I am not afraid. A bit jumpy, but not afraid. Sabres are rattling on all sides in tune to our rattling nerves. Pray. Keep calm and carry on.